A couple of weeks in the past it seemed a shoe-in certainty that Moto2 journeyman Joe Roberts could be becoming a member of the all-American Trackhouse Make Aprilia Nice Once more MotoGP crew. It made full sense. Joe was American, had a well-known surname, wasn’t horrible like Kurtis Roberts and had a radar proof face primarily based on the Lockheed F-117 Nighthawk. The crew had an area and Roberts was the plain selection.
Nevertheless earlier than the Austrian GP final weekend it was introduced by Trackhouse MAGA Racing that they’d chosen the extremely common Moto2 rider Ai Ogura as an alternative – and with that Joe Roberts grew to become the primary rider to ever get replaced by AI.
Roberts’ soul appeared crushed in Austria – with the Californian switching to a ‘properly what’s the purpose in making an attempt?’ technique of driving that noticed him end someplace that I can’t keep in mind. However what if we have been to let you know that there’s a higher choice? One that everybody, besides woke twat Sebastian Piffleton, would love? The return of Colin Edwards!
The Texas Windbag Colin Edwards has lengthy since left the MotoGP paddock. And it’s been poorer for it ever since. After retiring from racing Colin grew to become a preferred and educated (besides the profitable half) presenter. Nevertheless Edwards was slyly phased out by the TV channels for not towing the favored lefty rhetoric that states all households are blended race and unlawful immigrants are superior.
However we at MGPN need him again. And again on the observe. So listed here are our prime 5 the reason why Trackhouse Racing ought to rethink their 2025 line up and rent Colin Edwards as an alternative:
He’d really be fashionable
Nobody has an opinion of Ai Ogura. Nobody likes him and nobody dislikes him. Most don’t even know who he’s – and those who do in all probability can’t spell his surname. Nevertheless 95% of the MotoGP viewers will know the Texan rider. And of that 95% that do 110% of them will love him. We’re no mathematicians right here at MGPN however we reckon these numbers would make Trackhouse Racing very fashionable with everybody.
Old style fashion
As MotoGP riders get smaller and smaller and the bikes larger and greater the ‘new college’ means of driving when cornering is to hold off the bike like a circus primate. All very spectacular however a bit tiresome nowadays.
Colin’s retro one-off fashion, nevertheless, is at full odds with this new-fangled approach. As an alternative the win-shy American makes use of his prolonged neck to push his head as far to the within of a nook like a Scotsman peering over a wall for a misplaced 50p. Certainly Edwards’ head is so distant from his physique on the within of a nook that it’s estimated that it travels 23% much less distance than his torso and is effected by gravitational time dilation. Most likely.
PR Unfriendly
By the point riders make it into MotoGP they’ve been comprehensively skilled in solely saying what ought to be heard and never what they suppose. Like married males. For this reason all interviews are thoughts numbingly boring nowadays – much more so in WSBK if James Toseland is concerned.
However Colin Edwards comes from the old-school means of claiming no matter he thinks – and throwing in a handful of soiled innuendos and expletives in for good measure. And who doesn’t love listening to a flustered presenter apologising dwell on air for one thing that shouldn’t have been stated earlier than 9pm?
Not Spanish or Italian
The closest the Texan ever got here to being Italian was when he by chance ordered Lasagna at Bob’s Steak & Chop Home. Fortunately he was in a position to throw it on the ground and order a large lump of scrumptious cow as an alternative. MotoGP wants American racers – and actual old style People at that.
He wouldn’t really win
For all his years in MotoGP Edwards by no means managed to win a race. The closest the American got here was at Assen when the ‘cathedral of goals’ become a ‘pit of despair’ as he fell off on the final nook while main.
However this can be a good factor! Everybody loves an underdog and a trier. Take Bagnaia for instance – earlier than he began profitable he was fairly fashionable. However now he does everybody needs him to lose. Colin wouldn’t have this drawback.
